Castle Cleanup
by Cloudhead
Summary: After finding that his beautiful castle has fallen into disarray, Saix has something of a mental breakdown and forces everyone to declutter. Hilarity ensues, as usual, but there is something odd going on. Namely, Saix isn't being a complete jerk... This is a minor AU-see my profile. Platonic AkuSaiRokuShi (mostly AkuSaiShi). Rated T for safety. COMPLETE.
1. Chapter 1

**And here it is, the second major fic in the series The Reluctant Father. If you're new here, this takes place in the same universe as my first KH fic, Stupid Questions. It will be referenced multiple times, including major ending spoilers, so it highly recommended that you read it first. It's good, I promise. :) What You Make Me Feel also has events that play a role.**

**I would like to thank Raberba Girl, the other major Organization XIII writer here. I may be the king of Platonic AkuRokuShi, but she is the queen of Platonic Aku**_**Sai**_**RokuShi, which will be a major focus of this fic. The idea of Saix **_**not **_**being a complete jerk was alien to me at first, but her fics have warmed me up to the idea. Who knows—maybe the end of Stupid Questions was the first step in the healing process for Axel and Saix. (No, I won't tell you what I mean. Read it. :) ) They have far more than 358 days to heal their relationship in this universe, that's for sure. Thank you, Raberba Girl, for creating this genuinely unique platonic pairing. **

**DISCLAIMER: Kingdom Hearts belongs to Disney and Square Enix. I do not stand to profit from this work in any way. Mr. Nomura, if you're reading this, I have the utmost respect for you. Please send me the sea-salt ice cream recipe. Thank you. :)**

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**Castle Cleanup**

0=0=0=0=0=0

For the first time since he became a Nobody, Saix felt something other than exasperation. Unfortunately, it was horror.

Going into the basement of the Castle That Never Was probably hadn't been the best decision of the Luna Diviner's life. He could have done anything else with his day. Like shift through paperwork. Or plot last week's heart collection rates. Or ask permission from Xemnas to dusk Demyx for the 498th time.

But no. He had decided to investigate the Basement Where Nothing Lives (it was the last room Xemnas had named, and he was out of ideas by then), in search of a binder. Why he didn't make his dusks do this was beyond him. Perhaps Kingdom Hearts itself was influencing his actions. Either that, or he was simply going mad from the stress of running Organization XIII and its host of whacky personalities twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week.

In any case, if Saix hadn't been insane before, he was now. He wasn't sure what he had expected from a place called the 'Basement Where Nothing Lives', but he hadn't expected _this._

Apparently, the rest of the Organization thought of the Basement as part dumpster, part junk drawer. There were more boxes here than at most department stores, and all of them were unlabelled, stacked haphazardly and filled to the brim with random junk. Everything from broken figurines to unidentified wires to candy wrappers had been tossed here. The trash can had always seemed practically empty to Saix, and only seemed to be filled with trash only the Keybearers would produce. Now he knew why—Roxas and Xion were the only ones who ever actually threw anything away properly.

The name, it turned out, was apt. No lifeform could survive in this room for long.

Shaken for the first time in his career, Saix inspected the rest of the castle. He saw signs of disarray he hadn't noticed before. Books lying around here, empty elixir bottles over there. He even saw an empty pizza box—he had never approved a pizza purchase. The last pizza delivery had been before Roxas. Either there were unauthorized purchases going on under his nose, or… Saix stopped that train of thought right there.

Saix saw a terrible truth in front of his eyes. He had lost control.

For a man whose entire purpose in life was to be in control, all the time, this was equivalent to an accountant realizing that he stinks at math. The result can only be described as a psychotic break. That day, something in Saix fell apart. Something snapped.

Something caused him to decide immediately to hatch a plan.

0=0=0=0=0=0

Axel woke up as usual—with Xion literally dragging him out of bed so that Saix wouldn't be mad at him for getting up three hours late.

He sighed and rubbed his eyes. "You know, Xi, I am capable of getting up on my own."  
"Then why don't you?"  
"Because it isn't as convenient as rolling over and sleeping some more."

Xion rolled her eyes (that was a new one) and dragged him into the common room by the hand. Everyone else was already up. Saix was drawing on a whiteboard he wouldn't let anyone see. Demyx was eating some sugary cereal or another, and looked a little paranoid about Saix. Roxas had spaced out—he still did that from time to time. Everyone else was lounging around, pursuing their respective special interests.

No sooner had Axel sat down on the couch to sneak more sleep when Saix capped his marker, put a grey cloth over the whiteboard and rolled it out for viewing. The Luna Diviner had a crazy look in his eyes, the same look Larxene got when she was extremely annoyed. Axel sat up and took notice—he had never seen Saix like that.

"I have an announcement to make," Saix said. "You're all getting three days off…"

Everyone but Axel grinned in delight, especially Xion—three whole days for Beautiful Things!

"…To declutter."

Everyone but Roxas and Xion moaned. The Keybearers just looked confused.

"I've made an extensive plan for this operation." Saix pulled the cloth off the whiteboard, revealing the plan. When he said extensive, he meant it. There was so much text that Axel couldn't read it all. He could tell immediately that this was going to suck.

"Step one is a quick inventory," Saix continued. "I want you all to go to your rooms and make a list of everything you own, and I do mean everything. Report back to me when you're done. Questions?"

"Yes," Axel chirped. "Three days off heart collection for cleaning? Are you OK?"  
"I'm perfectly fine. We can put aside heart collection for a few days."  
"…Who are you? Where's Saix?"  
"You'll understand when you see the basement. Inventory, now."

As everyone sulked off to list things, Xion looked up at Axel. "What does 'declutter' mean?"  
"It means our lives will be a frenzied hell for the next three days."  
"What's a hell?"  
"Fuuuuuudge. Hell is fudge."

0=0=0=0=0=0

Xemnas declined to participate. What was Saix supposed to say to that?

Xigbar's inventory included two guns, infinite gun ammo, sixty gun magazines (thirty ammo containers, thirty paper mini-books) and ninety-nine copies of an unprintable form of… payment.

"…I need to start paying you in regular mission rewards."  
"But this is so much better!"

Xaldin's inventory included lots of spears, lots of spear upkeep equipment, lots of spear practice targets and a sleeping bag. With an extra spear.

"You organize these, right?"  
Xaldin's subsequent explanation of his spear organization system has been cut for your convenience.

Vexen's inventory included multiple science experiments (he had gotten new science equipment), a science desk, a poster with the scientific method on it, several hundred scientific data forms and a Gun of Discord.

"What's a Gun of Discord?"  
"That invention is, err, still in the prototype phase… can we talk about this some other time? Preferably when Axel isn't on the other side of the wall?"

Lexaeus' inventory included a metal heart-and-crown puzzle, a photo from when he was a Somebody, a few books and a 'Do Not Disturb' sign he had stolen from a hotel in Twilight Town, which was _always _on the door after bedtime.

"Number V, you do not need to be paranoid about Number XIV entering your room at night. I put a stop to that nonsense last time."  
Lexaeus just snorted.

Zexion's inventory was nearly a thousand different books, a reading light, a tablet filled to the brim with eBooks and the only true laptop in the Organization.

"Congratulations, you are the first person so far who actually had what I was expecting."  
Zexion muttered a 'thank you' while flipping through _Decluttering for Nobodies._

Saix did not make an inventory. Literally everyone else thought this was completely unfair. Of course, when it was brought to the Superior, he was completely disinterested, so they were stuck with it. Saix's room was always clean enough to eat off the floor, anyway.

Axel's inventory included all the major game consoles, several games for said consoles (a surprisingly large portion of which were actually kid-friendly), the only true television in the Organization, a DVD player, a VCR which he refused to part with, several DVDs and videotapes, a few hundred books, a stereo, a little under thirty classic rock albums, a Lego box (because what self-respecting man doesn't own a Lego box?), an ice cooler and several hundred boxes of Amano Brand sea-salt ice cream.

"The Keybearers have made you immature. Or maybe you always were."  
"Saix, there's this little thing called 'free time'…"

Demyx's inventory included lots of stuff. Seriously, that's what he put on the form Saix had given him.

The Luna Diviner got that look where it was like his eyes were on fire, and Demyx squeaked in what would certainly pass for terror.

Luxord's inventory included several hundred card decks, books on various card games, playing mats for various trading card games and a typewriter which he was using to write his memoir, _King of Hearts._

"You're writing a memoir?"  
"What's wrong with that?"  
"Nothing, it's just… unexpected."

Marluxia's inventory included several _thousand _plants, plus lots of stuff meant for plant care and an encyclopedia on lots of different pant types.

"It's a castle, not a greenhouse."  
"But it's so dreary!"

Larxene's inventory lots of unprintable lady stuff, three books, a cell phone (with no connection—the signal in a place that doesn't exist tends to be terrible) and a photo of Demyx. With twenty or so knives stuck through it.

There was a scream from outside the door. Demyx had been eavesdropping.

Roxas' inventory included a mattress, a mattress frame, a pillow, a blanket, a pencil, a journal, a coat, a coat, a coat… the inventory listed every last individual item.

Saix just slapped his head with his clipboard for a few minutes. Roxas was still there when he was done.

Xion's inventory included a Keyblade, a bed, a mirror, fourteen uniforms (two for each day of the week), three personal outfits (which she never wore), pajamas, five manga books, a pencil, a diary, lots of potions, elixirs, etcetera, and her stuffed friends Thomas the Elephant and Bird the Penguin.

"Number XIV. You have done well."  
"Thank you, sir."

0=0=0=0=0=0

Saix returned to the common room an hour later with a revised plan. He found it a little disappointing that XIV was the only one who had done the inventory correctly. It made him wonder whether he had ever had true control over Organization XIII at all. Certainly, any situation involving Vexen building a 'Gun of Discord' was wildly out of control. This, of course, only made Saix even more discouraged by the current state of affairs in the Castle That Never Was. But the cleaning project had to help, right?

"Okay," Saix said, sighing. "Xion, you already know what I think of your inventory. Roxas, your inventory was… adequate. The rest of you, I see a lot of stuff we can get rid of. We start tomorrow…" The Luna Diviner put on a tone of voice so mean it even made Xigbar shudder slightly. "…Except for Demyx."

Whether or not Demyx wet himself is a matter of contention. What is known is that he shot up and said in a very small voice, "No…"

"Number IX, you will be facing an Infernal Engine tomorrow. Solo. The rest of you, we start with Demyx's room. We don't know what he'd want to keep, so…"  
"Noooooo!" The Not-So-Melodious Nocturne got into a begging position. "You can't do this! You just can't! I'll rewrite it! I'll list every candy wrapper, and their brands!"  
"You should have done that the first time. Take your punishment like a man, Demyx."  
Demyx raised his arms to the heavens. "NOOOOOOOOOOO—"

A claymore whacked him upside the head. It wasn't hard enough to knock him out, just enough to make him stop screaming to say, "Ow!"

Saix looked at the gathered Organization members, losing the voice but keeping the cold stare. "Now we can sleep…"

0=0=0=0=0=0

Axel had just turned off the light when Xion slowly opened the door, gripping her stuffed elephant. "Are you still awake?"

Had it been anyone else, except maybe Roxas, he would have found this rather creepy. But Xion did this sort of thing. Sometimes things cropped up between ice cream and bed that required Axel's attention, and there was no real quiet time other than bed in the Organization. This was why Axel actually wore the Organization-issue pajamas instead of just sleeping in boxers.

He sat up, preparing for the hand-flicking motion to summon his chakrams (in case he needed to go 'chat' with someone). "What is it, Xi?"  
She closed the door behind her. "I don't think he wants anyone to know this, but Saix said I did well with the inventory."

Axel was holding the chakrams, but only because of that tense moment between 'this' and 'but'. He sighed and put them away. "Really? I've never heard of him praising you."  
"Because it hasn't happened before. That's why I came to you. Do you think he's changing his mind about me?"

Axel sighed once again and rubbed his face. "I don't know, Xion. This cleaning thing seems to have gotten something into him that wasn't there before. Don't get your hopes up—he might go back to being old Jerk Saix when this is all over."  
"I hope not. I want Saix to like me."  
"And why, my Keybearer, do you want Saix of all people to like you?"

Xion looked up at him with those sad puppy dog eyes that always made that spot where his heart used to be feel just a little warmer than usual. "Because he decides my fate."

Axel hugged her tight. If he had the choice, he'd never let go.

0=0=0=0=0=0

**That sad, pretty scene at the end of the chapter? That was not in the first two drafts. This is the advantage of seat-of-your-pants writing—you're going through the draft and you think, "You know what would make this better? A tender moment between Axel and Xion." That's why I don't outline. I just get an idea for a story and a central theme, and work from there. I chose the right fandom to write for, because it tends to produce little character moments like these, which are always the best moments in the games.**

**Anyway, yup, this might be 99% Platonic AkuSaiShi, with Roku noticeably absent. Don't worry, Roxas, I promise I'll give you a fic all to yourself when this is over. And Xion, please stop being greedy. I wrote one fic all about you and another fic where Axel was giving you the best day ever. And now you want a fic where **_**Saix praises you? **_**It's insanity. I need to find a way to break your hold on me, or poor Roxas will never get back into the Great Platonic Pairing. :) (I need to trademark these character talks… *wink*)**

**I feel like I should credit Raberba Girl for the idea of the Organization owning electronics. Can we all agree that it's a good idea? Once they get an internet connection over there, it could get really chaotic, really fast, especially when the Keybearers decide to use it as a second Axel. **_**Foreshadowing…**_

**I hope you enjoyed reading this first chapter. There will be more, of course. I think I like this fic-a-day thing—it makes me write more. Remember, reviews are always appreciated. I'll be giving a Roxas-focused giftfic based on a (reasonable) prompt of your choice to the first reviewer who can tell me the difference between a sitar and a guitar. I mean, are they even real? Let me know, because Rox is getting restless.**

**Thanks for reading, and be sure to tune in when Chapter 2 hits!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Something is streaking across the internet at a breakneck pace. It's headed straight towards us! Here it comes… *SMACK* Ow! Oh, it's just Chapter 2. :)**

**Yes, the time has come for more on the tale of the spring (winter?) cleaning of the Castle That Never Was. Interesting Fact Time: Microsoft Word does not recognize the word 'declutter'. Try it!**

**If you're reading from NYC or whereabouts, I hope you're doing OK in all that snow. I got some snow over here, but it wasn't nearly as bad as what NY got. New Yorkers, you have my sympathy. Hopefully, this will cheer you up. :)**

**Enough stalling. Let's get to it!**

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**Castle Cleanup, Part Two—Busybodies**

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The next morning, around five o'clock, Axel awoke to a very loud noise, metal banging against metal. It was right outside his door. Axel was just about to summon his chakrams when he heard a voice he had heard a million times before.

"Time to get cleaning!" Saix yelled. "Let's go! Up, up, up!"

Axel sighed and facepalmed. "He's gone insane," he said to no one in particular. "He has actually lost it."

With that, he got up and exited his room. Saix was already pounding on Demyx's door with his claymore. "Get up and get to Beast's Castle before I have to come up with an even worse punishment for you!"  
"I'm coming, I'm coming!" Demyx ran out of the room, his hair a mess and many potions and things flying out of his coat. He was gone before the Luna Diviner could say another word to him.

Axel rolled his eyes and called. "I'll wake up Rox and Xi. You'll scare their socks off that way."  
Saix turned his head. "The Keybearers woke up shortly after I knocked on Number IV's door. They're in the common room."  
"Saix, they need more sleep than this."  
"They appeared fine when I saw them."

Axel went to the common room, sighing and shaking his head. As promised, Roxas and Xion were in the common room. Not as promised, they were definitely _not _'fine'. They were sitting on the couch together, looking a little dazed. Xion jumped whenever Saix knocked, and her eyes were as big as saucer pans. Roxas was taking the opportunity to space out again.

Axel sat down next to them, still a little dazed himself. "You kids feeling OK?"  
Roxas nodded. Xion just put her head in her hands as Saix knocked yet again.  
"You two need something to eat?"  
They nodded in perfect unison.

Axel went in the kitchen. He was feeling bad for the two, so he grabbed some sugar-laden abomination that was probably not meant to be. The Keybearers were basically the opposite of hyper, sugar or none, but Axel tried to have them eat healthy anyway. In this case, though, he got them what he would have wanted for breakfast when he was fifteen given the circumstances.

As he prepared the dish, he wondered what was getting into Saix. First decluttering, then praising Xion, and now knocking on doors with his claymore? Clearly, something fishy was going on. Saix was always a busybody, but this was ridiculous, even for him. Axel didn't know what it was, but he could put up with it, as long as he kept the second part and lost the others.

He just hoped that bit would last well after the cleaning job.

0=0=0=0=0=0

Everyone stood together outside Demyx's room. "Axel," Saix said. "You have the honor."  
The Flurry of Dancing Flames smiled wickedly. "I've wanted to do this for a long time…"

Half an hour later, Demyx's room was spotless. Twenty-five minutes had been spent sweeping up the various ash piles.

0=0=0=0=0=0

After that, the job proceeded in numerical order (skipping Xemnas, of course). Xigbar was quite surprised to find his entire 'payment box' incinerated before he even got his foot in the door—Axel was taking no chances with the Keybearer's eyesight, whether Xigbar liked it or not. Xaldin lost a lot of spears, cutting him down to a more reasonable fourteen spears (reasoning being that every Organization member could have one in an emergency). Vexen lost the Gun of Discord (Saix: "Is this a toy or something?" Vexen: "I'll just toss that…"), Lexaeus returned the Do Not Disturb sign to the hotel and Zexion agreed to sell some books he didn't read anymore.

Yet again, Saix was skipped. Yet again, when this was brought to the Superior, he said something long-winded and flowery to the effect of, "Play nice, kids, I'm busy."

At last, they reached Axel's room. Unfortunately for everyone involved, the room was even messier than anticipated. In addition to setting a bad example for the youngsters (Roxas: "So, we're supposed to live like this?" Axel: "No!" Roxas: "Then why do you?"), this made it harder on everyone. It didn't help that most of it was stuff you couldn't just throw away. This room would clearly require a special procedure.

Saix took one look at it and turned to Axel. "If we sold all this, we'd be the richest nobodies in all the worlds."  
"What?" Axel was flabbergasted. "You can't do that!"  
Saix's voice got really low, like he didn't want anyone to hear. "We would finally be able to afford a fourteenth throne for the Proof of Existence."

Axel stopped for a moment, staring. Did Saix just say that? Did _Saix, _the man who probably still called Xion 'it' behind Axel's back, _just offer her a seat in the Proof of Existence?_

"…Really?" was all Axel could manage.  
The Luna Diviner got in real close. "I am very serious about this project, Number VIII. I'll do pretty much anything to fix this mess."  
Axel sighed deeply. "Okay, I'll start working on an estimate of what we can get from everything I'm willing to part with…"  
"Thank you."

0=0=0=0=0=0

Within an hour, Axel had a very large pile of stuff and a price tag for the whole pile—something along the line of three hundred thousand, well enough to get the materials for another throne. Xion had helped—she was the only other person allowed to know about the potential reward at this point, and she was quite excited by the prospect.

Saix looked over the room. Axel had done everything he could to satisfy Saix, to make sure he followed through with his promises. The room was immaculate, other than the huge 'to sell' pile in the middle. It was the first time in at least six months that his bed was made properly. He had even stuffed the remaining video games neatly into two boxes—'Keybearers may play' and 'No Keybearers'. It may not have been clear what had gotten into Saix, but whatever it was, it was working.

Saix turned, with what Axel called a 'Saix Smile' on his face—his usual look, but not as angry. "Good work, Axel."  
"He actually said it," Axel muttered to himself. "He actually commended my work. He actually said it…"

The Luna Diviner turned to Zexion, leaving Axel in his state of shock. "Do you know anyone who will buy these items?"  
Zexion looked up from _Clean Your House Now. _"Game World in Twilight Town will buy the gaming paraphernalia. That red-haired girl in Atlantica will probably pay triple list price for the music albums, and I could be long gone before she realizes they don't work underwater. The used bookstore will take the rest of it, but we would get a better sale on the internet, and I know an internet café in Twilight Town with good connection."  
Saix raised an eyebrow. "You know all this how?"  
"You learn a lot of things when you read as much as I do. Wheeling and dealing is among them."

Saix sighed and turned back to Axel. "While you did this, we worked on the other rooms. All the bedrooms except the Keybearer's have been decluttered, vacuumed and dusted. We work on the rest of the castle tomorrow."  
Axel looked at Saix suspiciously. "Why'd you skip Roxas and Xion's rooms?"  
"Because I'm saving them for last, at least before the basement."

Axel nodded, even though it wasn't a clear answer at all…

0=0=0=0=0=0

Axel thought about Saix's words as he lay in bed. This was _very _out of character for him. It was jarring, especially since there had been no transition between reluctant praise and offering a seat in the Proof of Existence.

Axel turned those words over and over in his mind. _Offering a seat in the Proof of Existence. _As much as Axel liked to believe that Saix was no more capable of hate than of love, he did treat Xion more as a means to an end than as a person. He had referred to Xion as 'her' once, and after that he was careful to not talk about her in front of Axel. All of a sudden, he was going nice guy? It was extremely suspicious, and Axel wondered if he'd have to give anything in return other than games he didn't play anymore and books he had never read anyway.

As if Kingdom Hearts itself could hear his thoughts, Xion walked in, this time carrying her stuffed penguin, Bird (she seemed to alternate between the two stuffed animals). "Hey, Axel?"  
Axel sat up. "Yeah, Xi?"  
"Do you think Saix is telling the truth about getting the extra seat?"  
He sighed heavily. He didn't do that before Roxas and Xion entered his life, that was for sure. "I'll tell you the same thing I told you last night. I don't know what's gotten into Saix, and you shouldn't get your hopes up. I'm afraid he'll go back on that promise." Then he smirked. "That is, if I let him. Which if he thinks I would in a million years, he's in for a surprise."

Xion smiled. "Thank you, Axel."  
"I'll always be there for you, Xi. Always. Got it memorized?" Without waiting for an answer, Axel hugged her again. He seemed to be doing that a lot since these kids appeared in front of him…

0=0=0=0=0=0

**Yes! I actually used the catchphrase properly! Yes! :)**

**Trust me, I was just as surprised by Saix's decision as Axel was. It just came out of the pencil as I was writing the first draft longhand, and I was like, "Sai, are you OK?" And of course, Roxas got shorted again. I think Xion may be using a mind control device. Next time I play through Days, I'm wearing a tinfoil cap. :) Maybe I should bump this up to a defining story arc, since this is a huge deviation from canon. In the words of TV Tropes, OOC is Serious Business.**

**I'm having a bit of trouble with name variety. Technically, everyone in the Organization except Xion has three names—their actual name, their number designation and their title. My original plan was to use the regular name most of the time, the number when Saix is being cold and the title when whoever it refers to is being awesome (or, in the case of Demyx and Vexen, not so awesome). But the regular names get repetitive, and when there are fourteen people who could conceivably all talk at once, you need to say who's talking or doing something every single time. It's a problem, and I'm not sure how to fix it. I want the titles to stay as a way to signal 'this person is doing something important right now', and the numbers are really cold. And Xion has no title, so when she inevitably does something awesome, I don't know what I'll call her…**

**Anywho, I hope you enjoyed Chapter 2. Remember, reviews are always appreciated. The sitar-versus-guitar giftfic offer still stands.**

**Thanks for reading, and tune in for Chapter 3 to see what surprises Saix springs on Axel next…**


	3. Chapter 3

**A Wild Chapter 3 appears! Yeah, I'm running out of witty things to say in Author Notes. :)**

**So, I checked the news yesterday morning, and as it turns out, NYC got nothing and Boston got a **_**hurricane in the middle of winter. **_**I shouted out to the wrong city. So, people of Boston, stay safe. You're in my thoughts.**

**Anyway, back to happier topics. We've got ourselves another chapter right here. Read and enjoy. :)**

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**Castle Cleanup, Part Three—Musical Thrones**

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_Clang! Clang! Clang!_

On most days, the members of Organization XIII called this 'Wednesday morning'. Today, it was a signal of yet more cleaning to be done.

Saix stood in front of the line of nobodies now gathered in the common room. Axel was exasperated, Demyx was still in something of a catatonic state (he had been silent all night, staring at his perfectly clean room), Larxene looked murderous and the Keybearers had _both _spaced out. Everyone else looked very annoyed and tired.

Saix sighed once again. "You're not going to like what I'm about to say," he said, clearing his throat. "The Castle That Never Was is a big place. It will take more than a day to clean. So I'll just say now that when I said three days, I wasn't counting inventory day."

Everyone moaned at once, an orchestra of tired, overworked, just-about-ready-to-break-something nobodies turned maids. Saix raised his hand. "I do have good news for you. We will have an hour-long break starting at noon."

The nobodies might have been encouraged by this if they were more conscious. Noticing the distinct lack of reaction, Saix said softly, "And we drink coffee first."

Everyone shuffled to the kitchen, even Roxas and Xion, who were slowly coming out of their trance-like states and beginning to wonder what in the worlds coffee was. Hey, if Saix was offering it to them before cleaning, it had to be a good thing.

In Organization XIII, coffee had genuine caffeine in it, and that was where the goodness stopped. The only brand Saix would allow purchase of was less coffee and more a caffeinated cup of black sludge. Most of the time, the members found alternate ways to wake themselves up, including energy drinks and spoonfuls of pure sugar (much to Axel's annoyance—that was a bad example for the Keybearers). This time around, though, no one really cared, as long as it made them no longer want to collapse on the floor and sleep some more.

Twelve pre-made cups were sitting on the counter, with each mug printed with a Roman numeral corresponding to the member it belonged to. Saix had even put a little extra sugar in Roxas and Xion's cups to make the concoction _slightly _more edible. Everyone took a cup and drank.

"This tastes terrible," Roxas said immediately.  
"Yeah," Xion followed. "Like cooking oil."  
Vexen sighed. "Excellent observation. Send it to a science journal."  
Axel was still crawling to consciousness. "Xi, are you saying that you drank cooking oil?"  
"Yes. I never made that mistake again."  
"…How much did you drink?"  
"Only a tiny sip. And I spat it out."  
"Then I don't have the energy to deal with it."

Saix facepalmed. That explained why all the cooking oil bottles had been thrown in the trash a few weeks ago unused. Axel just made a mental note to himself to explain to the Keybearers what was and was not edible in the kitchen.

Despite their complaints, the two finished their whole cups.

0=0=0=0=0=0

When everyone had awoken to full capacity, the cleaning resumed. The common room was easy enough—generally, everyone was wise enough not to make the place where a clean freak gave them missions messy. The other rooms went similarly well, despite Saix's claims at every room that the mess was huge. What Saix was seeing just didn't register to anyone else.

Once they got to the Proof of Existence, everyone except Xion protested that it was already clean_, _because_ you_ _weren't allowed to bring anything in. _The Luna Diviner didn't care a bit. Xemnas might have objected to mops being brought into the place, but he was absorbed in looking at Kingdom Hearts with his arms raised to the heavens, as usual.

Mopping the Proof of Existence was no simple task, even for thirteen people. For one thing, the room was _big. _Forget just one more throne—they could probably fit twenty, plus enough folding chairs for all the lesser nobodies. And Saix wanted every square inch of the place mopped completely unnecessarily. He didn't even allow use of the dusks—he wanted everyone to learn 'discipline'.

Demyx finally broke his silence. "Sir, with all due respect—and I do respect you, yes sir—I don't think we need to clean this room."

Saix stared at him coldly, this time putting on the 'laser eyes' look. Demyx quickly added, "But I'll do it anyway, because you are an awesome person, and you're always right, eh, Sai?"  
"Good answer," was all the Luna Diviner said in return.

0=0=0=0=0=0

As the mopping went on, Roxas and Xion found themselves working the same general area as Demyx. The Melodious Nocturne was frantically mopping, probably hoping to prove to Saix that he could work hard if he had to. He had a strange look in his eyes, probably whatever the nobody version of fear looked like.

Roxas looked around the room, making sure no one was listening in. "I can't believe you stood up to Saix," he said in a whisper.  
"Well, I tried to, anyway," Demyx said, keeping his eyes on the floor he was mopping. "Don't follow my example, kids. That man has a screw loose."  
As Roxas pondered the phrase 'has a screw loose', Xion started mopping the area in front of Demyx. "You still stood up to him," she said, also whispering. "That was pretty brave of you."  
"Well, thanks, little lady. It was pretty much my brief awesome moment, wasn't it?" Before Xion could chide him for calling her 'little lady', he said, "Hey, you kids know how to play sitar?"

The Keybearers looked at each other. "Nope," they said in unison.  
"I can teach you," Demyx said, smiling for the first time since he saw his room. "We could be, like, a band or something."

Roxas hesitated—Axel had told him not to trust _anyone, _and while it did keep him from getting into too much trouble most of the time, it was also the exact dictionary definition of paranoia. Xion, on the other hand, didn't even stop for a moment. "I'd love to learn!"

Both Roxas and Demyx were surprised by her eagerness. For all of Demyx's flaws, Xion actually liked his music, at least the purely instrumental stuff. She had never been brave enough to say so, since everyone knew the singing was horrible, and most ignored the sitar playing as a result.

Demyx beamed. "Great! That's one student. You want in too, Roxas?"  
Roxas scratched the back of his neck, a habit he wasn't quite sure the origin of. "Well, if Xion's doing it, then I guess I'm in, too."  
Demyx clapped like an excitable fangirl. "Ah, yeah! First lesson at breaktime. This is going to be great!"

0=0=0=0=0=0

Have you ever seen a cat scared? Its fur puffs out, its eyes go wide, and its tail goes straight up in the air. It just stands there for a moment, stiff as cardboard. Think of that, then times it by around fifty and add a few orders of magnitude for good measure.

This was just about Axel's reaction to the sight of his Keybearers sitting with Demyx, attempting to play his sitar, _and actually sounding pretty decent._

The Flurry of Dancing Flames just stood between the kitchen and the common room for a while, sandwich still halfway to his mouth, eyes open wide. He took in the sound of the sitar, filling the room with music that sounded far better than what a beginner would normally make. Roxas sounded fairly good, but Xion was the real talent—she made the simple nursery rhymes they were practicing sound absolutely beautiful. Axel was both awestruck and dumbfounded.

As Xion finished 'Mary Had A Little Lamb', Demyx patted her on the shoulder. "Nice, Xi! You're a natural." He looked up at Axel. "Hey, Ax. Come sit with us, Xi here is amazing!"

All Axel could think was, _Only I get to call her that, you lazy, dumb, cowardly twit._

Demyx mistook teeming jealousy for simple reluctance. "Looks like our friend needs some encouragement! Xi, sing 'Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star' again, will you?"

That's when Xion started not only playing the sitar with amazing grace, but also _singing._

"_Twinkle, twinkle, little star…"_

Axel dropped his sandwich right about here. Xion's voice was _beautiful, _with clarity, resonance and harmony. It was better than the mermaids in Atlantica.

"_How I wonder what you are…"_

Poor Axel. Blindsided by the sheer talent, he was forced to sit down on the floor. All of his favorite female singers seemed to combine to form her voice. He hadn't heard anything as beautiful since he was a Somebody.

"_Up above the world so high…"_

This was when Saix entered the room. He seemed like he was about to tell everyone to get back to work, but then he heard the singing.

"_Like a diamond in the sky…"_

Saix stood in the doorway, not moving a muscle. He didn't seem awestruck like Axel, but he didn't seem unimpressed, either.

"_Twinkle, twinkle, little star…"_

The two stared at Xion with the sitar as the music rose to its conclusion, fire and moonlight shining on a black rose.

"_How I wonder what you are."_

The room became completely silent. It suddenly felt empty, devoid of something. Xion closed her eyes, sighed, then opened them again and smiled. "Did I do well?" she asked.

More silence. After a moment, Demyx beamed. "That was _awesome. _Like, even better than the first time. And the first time had me stunned, remember?"

Axel, still not quite capable of forming words, just watched Saix as he slowly walked out.

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**Yup. I just made Xion a super singer. Nothing I can say could possibly add to this. :)**

**This appeared from my typing hands just as all of my best scenes do. I was originally going to go for the scream that .7 suggested, but then I thought I was being too mean to Demyx and I should give him a chance to redeem himself, then this popped into my head and I thought, "Oooo, where will this take the story?" I like the result. This could be a major turning point in the plot. All in favor of bumping this up to a defining story arc on my profile?**

**The 'fire and moonlight' phrase came from the title of Raberba Girl's AkuSai short story collection. It's pretty good, you should read through it. I'd recommend reading it via DeviantArt, since it's her preferred method of posting fanfic. **

**Roxas finally got multiple lines in one chapter! And yet, Xion still managed to blow the poor guy out of the water. I think he's just waiting in the wings, thinking, "Is it my turn now? How about now? Is she done yet? Can I join in, at least? Is it my turn yet?" Or maybe Xion mind controlled him into following her will to be the star of the show, as well… Don't look into her eyes, Rox, she's using hypnosis… :)**

**As always, I hope you enjoyed Chapter 3. Remember, reviews are always appreciated. If someone doesn't tell me the difference between a sitar and a guitar soon, Rox might force me took it up myself just so he can get his fic already. He's lined up to make oatmeal poorly, people! Save him! :)**

**Thanks for reading, and watch out for Chapter 4, the most shocking chapter yet…**


	4. Chapter 4

**Settle down, reader. Chapter 4 has arrived, and I have finally run out of poor attempts at intro humor. :)**

**So apparently, the room I was calling the Proof of Existence is actually called either the Round Room or the Room Where Nothing Gathers. *presses Homer Simpson 'D'oh!' button* Sorry, it's been a **_**loooooooooong **_**time since I played KH2. Hopefully, I can get the ReMix soon. I'll call it the Round Room from now on (because the Room Where Nothing Gathers is really stupid—clearly, Organization XIII gathers there! :) ). Just pretend I've always been calling it that. Ability to edit after posting, FFN! Get to it! *wink***

**In other news, Castle Cleanup is officially longer than Stupid Questions! *confetti* I'm on a roll. :)**

**So, without further ado, here is that shocking chapter I promised. *prepares best seat-of-the-pants writing skills…***

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**Castle Cleanup, Part Four—Three Living Flowers**

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After Saix left, unnoticed by the three musical prodigies, Axel managed to pick himself up. He went over to Demyx and whispered, in a tone of voice that made the various ones the Luna Diviner had used sound like Xion's singing, "See me in the hall. Now."

Demyx got up, signaling the Keybearers to keep playing as he headed into the dark hallway opening into the common room. He looked somewhat terrified, as anyone would, but he didn't seem nearly as scared as he should have been. This only set Axel off even more.

Once they got into the hall, Axel looked Demyx right in the eye. "Listen here. I was not informed that Roxas and Xion were taking music lessons from you. And I'm supposed to know everything they do, because if I don't, if I just let them run off and figure things out themselves, they're going to get hurt. Badly."  
Demyx raised his hands up in a gesture of defensiveness. "Whoa, there, Ax. What makes you think I'm going to hurt them?"  
"Nothing. You aren't capable of hurting a spider, you little coward. But if it's you today, stealing them away from me, what if it's Vexen tomorrow, or Saix, or even Xemnas?"  
Demyx whistled. "You have a serious case of jealousy, my friend. When was I ever stealing them away from you? It's music lessons, for crying out loud."  
Axel scowled. "You're unusually brave today, aren't you? First you stand up to Saix, and then you talk back to me. I'm not sure whether to call that an improvement or not."  
"Ax, dude, calm down. You heard Xi, you—"  
Axel pushed Demyx into a wall. "Only I get to call her Xi. You are to call her Xion. Is that understood?"  
Demyx was shocked. His mouth hung open for a moment before he said, "Fine, you heard _Xion. _Whole name there. You saw how much she loved it, how much she put herself into it. Do you want to ruin that for her?"

Axel stared Demyx down for a moment. Then he sighed. "That is the only reason I will allow this to continue, because Xion is so happy about it and because her singing is so beautiful and if I made her sad or angry with me over it I'd never be able to forgive myself. But if you hurt her, if she ever comes back to me with so much as a scratch, well…" Axel summoned his chakrams for effect. "They don't call me the Flurry of Dancing Flames for nothing."  
Demyx nodded hard. "She'll come back to you in mint condition every time, Ax. Promise."

With that, Axel stormed off, trying to convince himself that he couldn't feel jealousy since he had no heart. He wasn't doing a very good job of it. He still thought that Demyx had some nerve not coming to him first, but if it was just that, he would have gotten over it after hearing the singing.

_Oh, Xi, _he thought to himself as he set out to attend to the other thing bothering him. _How the hell did you turn me into this?_

0=0=0=0=0=0

Saix sat on his bed. He didn't normally sit on his bed—why sit on a place meant for sleep when there was a perfectly good chair just a few feet away? But today wasn't normal. Nothing about the last few days had been normal.

There was a knock on the door. "Come in," Saix said reluctantly.

Axel walked in, closing the door behind him. He looked Saix in the eye. "I need to talk to you… Isa."  
Saix stood up. "That name is dead to me. It's been dead to me for years. You know that, Number VIII."  
"Don't you 'Number VIII' me this time, Isa. We're going to have a talk. We're going to talk like we used to. Because honestly, I'm tired of playing word games with you."  
Saix sighed and closed his eyes. "Fine then. We'll have a talk, if that's what you want. Lea."

Axel didn't cool down his stare, but his voice did get a little less cold. "That's better. Now, then, tell me the real reason you've been so nice to Xion lately."  
"I've been nice to… her… how?"  
"Offering her a seat in the Round Room, for one. You sure weren't that nice a few days ago."  
"The seats are symbolic, Axel. As much as I hate to admit it, it is true that we mostly listen to the Superior ramble on while we're in there. They don't actually mean anything."  
"Symbolic, huh? The whole point of symbols is that they _do _have meaning. The seats are a symbol of membership in the Organization, just as much as the uniform. What you're basically doing is inducting her into the Organization for real."

Saix looked at Axel with an unreadable stare. "And why does this displease you?"  
"It doesn't make me displeased. It makes me suspicious. When is the other shoe going to drop, Isa? What do you want in return for not calling her 'it' and giving her a throne?"  
"Nothing, Lea. I want nothing in return, except to get this castle clean."

Axel blinked, but maintained his cold look. "Really?"  
"Contrary to popular belief, Lea, I am not a mean, scary werewolf robot monster. I am a pragmatist. A realist. I was calling Xion 'it' because, as much as you deny it, she is a creation. Vexen messed up some part of the process, and we got a little girl instead of what we were hoping for. And yet she is still useful to us, so we allow her to exist."  
Axel stared even harder. "And here I was thinking you had changed."  
"I just told you. I'm merely telling the truth. And I will tell another truth, Lea. For every little way she unnerves me and annoys me and drives me up a wall, she still wears the coat, and I do respect that."  
"You never acknowledged this alleged respect before. She's been constantly trying to please you since she got here, and all you've done is either ignore her completely or verbally abuse her."  
Saix sighed. "Because I must make an example to the other members. If I were to show sentimentality towards her in front of them, I would lose control."

Axel threw his hands out. "Guess what, Isa! No one cares! You've never had any control over Organization XIII. People go out on the missions you assign because they have to and because that big heart-shaped moon up there is getting bigger, and they want a piece of that pie. And besides that, what you call sentimentality, I call not being a jerk."

The two nobodies, best friends once upon a time, stared each other down for a long time. Both were breathing heavy. Despite having not been the one to raise his voice, Saix seemed to be breathing harder, as if trying to hold back an eruption.

"…Lea," the Luna Diviner said, after a long minute. "You just summed up the entire reason I started this project. I am regaining control over the situation."  
"Cleaning isn't going to cut it, Isa. The mess of this so-called Organization runs deeper than that." Axel counted off on his fingers. "We have no chemistry whatsoever, the rest of the Organization see Roxas and Xion as tools instead of people, everyone is trying to further their own agenda without regard for anyone else. This is the opposite of organization! Open your eyes and get it memorized, because the Keybearers are the only reason we'll ever complete Kingdom Hearts, and Xion is one half of that duo!"

Saix sighed again. "There are two more truths I want to tell you. If you're done, I'd like to continue."  
Axel snorted. "Go ahead, if it makes you feel better."  
"First, I may have respected her before, but when I heard Xion singing, when I heard that music, I got it. I finally understood why you're so protective of them. I saw the light in that girl, Lea. You three are the only three living flowers left in a bed of twelve wilted ones. I'd ask you to memorize that, because I'm not going to say it again."

Axel was taken aback. Saix had never said anything like that. He had always said he disapproved of the trio of friends. Now he was admitting that it had all been an act, an attempt to stay in control?

Saix got up close. "Here is the final truth I want you to know. Tell it to Roxas and Xion and no one else. On the day I decided to launch this cleaning project, I went into the basement looking for a binder. The reason I was looking for a binder was because I had just completed some calculations I wanted to stay separate from the rest of the paperwork. The reason I wanted it to stay separate was because I had made a huge discovery. You want us to talk like old times, Lea? We'll play Big Secret. I'll give you three chances to guess what it is before I tell you, just like old times. Go ahead."

Axel crossed his arms, just like he used to. "You really are a werewolf."  
"Incorrect. Try again."  
"Xion is worthy of respect, just like everyone else, and that's why—"  
"No."  
"We never needed hearts in the first place."  
Saix paused for effect, just like he used to. "You never were good at that game."  
"Then what is the Big Secret, Isa?"

Saix's voice dropped to a whisper. "Accounting for planned days off, at the current rate of heart collection, Kingdom Hearts will be complete in exactly three hundred and thirty six days. That's New Years Day. We will start a new year with our hearts finally returned to us."

Axel gasped. He took in the words, processing them fully. Kingdom Hearts was almost done. They'd have hearts again, just in time for the new year. Roxas, Xion, himself…

Saix sighed one more time. "And without Xion," he said. "It'd take at least twice that time, probably even more. That is why I respect her. That is why I no longer refer to her as 'it'. That is why I am making her a full member. We can complete Kingdom Hearts in a year with her. She is our future. Xion is the key."

Axel sat down on the chair. Saix left the room, to finish the job he had started, and the Flurry of Dancing Flames just sat in stunned silence.

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**The ball has been knocked out of the park and is headed on a route to Alpha Centauri. :)**

**Yes, when I told you it would be shocking, I meant it. I have decided to bump this up to a defining story arc, because I have officially thrown canon out the window. Now, whether it will actually make a difference in the end... I don't know yet. Seat-of-the-pants writing FTW! :)  
**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Remember, reviews are always appreciated. Dragon Silhouette answered the sitar versus guitar question quite thoroughly, as did DementoFantasy. As DS already got a fic, Demento will get the Roxas-centered fic. Roxas is running around the living room, yelling "WHOO-HOO!" :)  
**

**Thanks for reading, and tune in for the thrilling conclusion to Castle Cleanup! **


	5. Chapter 5

**Hopefully you have recovered from the shocking surprises of Chapter 4, because Chapter 5 is ready for reading, and it wants read now. :)**

**I will warn you now—Roxas is going to get the boot one more time. I say this in advance because I already know that this chapter is going to be my Xion Fanboy Indulgence chapter, just as the rest of this fic has been. Respect from Saix, an excessively large throne in the Round Room (how do they even get up there?! *wink*), the whole nine yards. No, that was not an intentional Super Bowl reference. :) In any case, if you don't like Xion… well, you should have stopped reading long ago, because as I just said, this is the Official Cloudhead Xion-Is-Awesome Fic. Thanks for reading anyway, though. :)**

**With that out of the way, let's get going!**

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**Castle Cleanup, Part Five—The Bright Shadow  
**

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Saix walked back into the common room slowly. He did this for two reasons. The first was, of course, to give him a chance to recover from his talk with Axel. The second reason was because Xion was still playing the sitar, and Saix wanted to give himself time to soak it in a little more.

When he got there, he saw that Demyx looked a little shaken. He remembered that Axel had looked extremely jealous of the Melodious Nocturne during the singing. For a very brief moment, no longer than a second, Saix actually almost felt bad for the man. Almost. This had never happened before, and it certainly never happened again. Saix made a mental note to himself to investigate later.

For now, he clapped his hands. "I have another announcement to make, everyone."

Eleven nobodies sighed in unison and stood up, getting into the same line they had that morning. Saix looked them all in the eye, but lingered on the Keybearers. _These children are our victory, _Saix thought to himself. _Both of them, even the one I thought of merely as a puppet just a few days ago. Who would have guessed that?_

Saix cleared his throat. "After some thought, I've decided that if we all work hard together, we can finish the Keybearers rooms within half an hour and have the basement done before dinner. It will be hard work, but we can be done today."

There were many sighs of relief. It was very rare that Saix elicited such a positive response. Actually, it hadn't happened before at all. Axel had been right those few weeks ago—it was amazing what happened when one actually did nice things.

He continued. "Once the basement is done, we'll have a good dinner and meet in the Round Room. I have another announcement to make there…" He looked Xion in those big, blue eyes. "…A very important one."

Xion's facial expression began to fluctuate wildly, showing everything from terror, to confusion, to worry, to sheer joy. Saix had never found Xion cute. He actually thought her resemblance to a teenage girl was uncanny and slightly creepy. But now that he could see her as a person, he could see where Axel was coming from. Yet another change of attitude for the Luna Diviner. He wondered if he'd have to send someone solo against three Infernal Engines to regain his reputation.

Then again, he had tried being feared for years, and it didn't seem to be working. Maybe it was time to try another angle.

0=0=0=0=0=0

Attempting to clean Roxas' room was absolutely pointless. This was not because it was messy. Quite the opposite—there was literally _nothing to clean. _Roxas was the cleanest person in the Organizaation, besides Saix himself. This was probably at least partially because he wasn't really into personal possessions. Saix wondered if the blond Keybearer had been the real robot all along.

He did find one ice cream stick, with the word _WINNER _printed on it. He looked at Roxas. When the boy shook his head, he threw it back into the drawer and closed it shut.

Xion's room was very similar. Saix was about to just close the door and deal with the basement when Xion rushed in and started straightening things frantically. She didn't seem aware that Saix thought the room was just fine. She remade the bed which was already made, placing her stuffed toys neatly (and in a way that even the Luna Diviner had to admit looked… ahem… cute) on the newly fluffed pillow. She checked the floor for non-existent garbage. She even made her manga pile even straighter than it already was, which the laws of physics should have denied her.

Saix didn't smile—he wasn't getting _that _nice just yet—but he did nod in approval when she was done. "Good work, Xion," he said, not making an attempt to hide it from the other members this time. He could feel the eleven pairs of surprised eyes on him, but all he cared about was the first genuine smile Xion had shown him since she came to the castle.

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The basement? _Sweet poetry._

Saix braced himself as he slowly opened the door to the Basement Where Nothing Lives. As it swung all the way open, he found himself shutting his eyes tight. He sighed and forced himself to open them again.

He did not know he was capable of true shock before that moment. Even the horror he had felt when he saw it the first time had simply been exasperation increased to a breaking point. Shock, surprise, that was new.

He felt this because the basement was empty.

The boxes were gone, and everything in them had disappeared as well. The light was actually on, which it hadn't been the first time. The floor looked wet, as if newly mopped. The basement, the room Saix had saved for last because it would be the worst room of all, the room that had ignited the whole project to clean the Castle That Never Was, was _clean._

Axel was standing in the middle of the room, smirking and crossing his arms. "Fixed that little problem for you, Sai," he said in the cocky tone of voice he had used so many times in their youth. "It wasn't like we were going to use anything tossed down here anyway, so I just burned it all. You're welcome."

The Luna Diviner put on his best 'Saix Smile'. "You may opt out of one mission. Remind me when I try to give it to you."  
"I'll remember that, Saix. Don't think I won't."  
"I'm well aware that you will…"

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What did Xion's mind sound like as Organization XIII waited for dinner? It was something like this:

_Am I in trouble? No, Saix said I did a good job. But then what is the announcement? It has to do with me, I know it. Oh, no, I'm in trouble with Xemnas! But what did I ever do to him? Would Saix stand up for me? No, he probably isn't that nice yet …_

This lasted the whole half-hour they were waiting in the Dining Room Where Time Stops (not too inaccurate a name, when you're waiting for things to put in your stomach). It was maddening. Xion hated secrets. They always made her anxious like this, since fearing Saix had trained her to always assume worst-case scenario and thus never be disappointed.

Roxas noticed her apprehension. There was one big table, and the Organization sat on chairs in numerical order, with Xemnas at the head. As such, the Keybearers were seated next to each other at the end of the table, near the window.

Roxas scooted a little closer to her, mostly to keep the conversation private—numerical order meant they were seated next to Larxene, and Axel was on the other side of five people. "What's wrong?" he asked, doing his best to whisper without drawing suspicion.  
Xion waved dismissively. "Oh, nothing."  
"You look a little nervous."  
"Oh, I'm just nervous about the meeting in the Round Room. But it's fine, really."  
"Saix did look at you when he said it was important."  
_Axel taught me how not to say things in the most boring way possible, and he never taught Roxas? _"Yeah, that's why I'm nervous. I have a good feeling about it, though."

Xion glanced at the door. Now that she thought about it, Saix was late for the first time in pretty much forever, as was Xemnas…

0=0=0=0=0=0

The two Organization leaders were on the roof, having an important conversation.

"We will finally complete Kingdom Hearts, Superior, and it is all thanks to her. I think it's time."  
"You realize that once we make this decision, there is no turning back. She will be far more autonomous. It may affect our plans."  
"Yes, our plans will be affected. But all those plans have one goal—to complete Kingdom Hearts. If I may use an idiom, I believe we should keep our eye on the prize."  
"I sense that this means more to you than our goals. Do not allow yourself to grow attached to her as Number VIII has and lose sight of the very prize you seek."  
"I would never do such a thing, Superior."  
"…Fine then. We shall enact this new plan. I hope you fully understand the magnitude of this decision."  
"I do. That is why I am making it."

0=0=0=0=0=0

Once dinner had concluded, all of Organization XIII met in the Round Room. The original thirteen sat in their usual seats, while Xion stood in the middle of the room. All hoods were up. An outside observer may have found it very unnerving. To Xion, this was Day One all over again.

"Number XIV," Xemnas said in his most dramatic voice. "You are the Keyblade's Chosen. You have proven yourself worthy. Before, you were but a student, a pupil. Now you shall be a true member of Organization XIII."

Xion nodded. She would have smiled, if the hooded figures surrounding her in the thrones weren't so darn intimidating.

"I hereby grant you your full name," Xemnas continued. "Number XIV. Xion. The Bright Shadow."

The Superior slammed his hand down on his chair, causing a large, dramatic echo. He didn't usually add such flourishes, but they were becoming more frequent, and besides, this was a special event, one that had never happened before in Organization history—a promotion.

Xion thought about her newly bestowed title. The Bright Shadow—dark, dramatic, a little sad, completely contradictory, but it had a ring to it. After a few seconds thought, she decided she liked the name.

"In addition, you shall be granted a seat in this room. Respect this throne, for it is your authority."

Xemnas raised his hand. In a truly impressive display of force, an utterly massive throne rose from the ground next to Roxas' seat. It was the shortest of all the thrones, slightly shorter than the one next to it, but it was still amazing to look at from the ground. Everyone jumped, especially Axel, who was probably thinking something like _I sold all that stuff to pay for it, and it's actually free?!_

When the room finally stopped shaking, Xemnas looked back down on the Bright Shadow. "Do you accept this new position of power and responsibility?"  
Xion didn't hesitate for a moment. "Yes, Superior."  
"In that case, take your seat, Number XIV."

Xion looked up at the ludicrously large throne. _No ladder or anything?_

Roxas looked down and made an open-hand gesture. Understanding, Xion opened a dark corridor up to the top of the throne. Standing on it gave her a serious sense of vertigo, so she sat down quickly and grasped for dear life, trying not to look down—at least at the clocktower, someone could grab her if she started to fall.

Xemnas started one of his usual dramatic, flowery speeches. "We are on the cusp of a new era for Organization XIII. Kingdom Hearts will be complete soon. For many, for the ones with hearts, it shall pass by in the blink of an eye, but for us, it shall seem to be an endless wait, for it is our final goal. But we shall remain patient, for one day soon, Kingdom Hearts will finally glow brightly, and we will truly, finally exist. We shall have hearts of our very own."

Most of the Organization had lost interest by this point. Saix seemed to be paying attention, but he was glancing at Xion every sentence or so. Xion, not knowing the true nature of these 'meetings' yet, was hanging on every word.

"Our Keybearers have brought us much glory, and because of them we will live to see the day when we are endowed with hearts again. The Keyblade is our future, and our hearts shall be returned by their masterful grace."

_I don't know all those words, _Xion thought. _But I'm pretty sure he just said the same thing twice in a row…_

The rest of the speech has been cut. This is a chapter, not the whole novel.

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The sea-salt trio met in Axel's room after the meeting. Technically, bedtime had started when they were finally dismissed after an hour (fairly short for Xemnas, actually), but Axel insisted that the first true promotion of an Organization XIII member deserved a party.

The definition of 'party', of course, is fairly loose here. Axel had quickly painted and hung up a banner reading _Congratulations Bright Shadow_. He had also broken out a box of sea-salt ice cream, which contained fifteen bars—enough for each person to have five, which was their usual maximum anyway. Of course, Xion didn't know what a real party looked like anyway, so this was perfectly fine for her.

Axel patted Xion on the head. "How does it feel to be a real Organization member, Bright Shadow?"  
Xion giggled a little. "I like the title, but you don't have to call me that." Then she thought. "It… isn't actually that different. The meeting was really boring. I have to do this once a week now?"  
"Yeah, you have to listen to Xemnas ramble on every week. That's the only real downside, though."

Xion smiled and stared out the window. "I'm just glad I don't have to be constantly paranoid Saix will dusk me anymore."  
Axel laughed. "I'll tell you a little secret. There was never any danger of that. I would have forced him to change you back, and then thrown him off the top of the castle. Probably would have forced him to let me film him wearing a diaper and hugging puppies before I threw him off, too."  
Roxas shuddered. "That is one scary image."  
"Can't argue with that, Rox. Like I said, no one is going to get dusked on my watch."

They all laughed together. That's when they heard a knock on the door. Axel got up and carefully opened it slightly.

Saix was standing there. "What are you doing?"  
"Just celebrating Xion's promotion."  
"That's what the ceremony was for."  
"Let's be honest here, Saix. What do you think the Bright Shadow wants—a long-winded speech, or five bars of sea-salt ice cream?"  
Saix gave the impression of rolling his eyes, though he was actually too calm for that. "I never did understand your obsession with that flavor. It sounds like it would taste horrible to me."  
"You can't judge a food you haven't eaten, Saix."

Saix looked at him for a moment. "…Do you have a bar I could try?"  
Axel beamed and turned around. "Rox, get the camera! Our boss is going to eat sea-salt ice cream!"  
"It can't be off the record?"  
"I always need a little blackmail, Sai. Helps on a rainy day, you know?""  
"…Fine."

Roxas got the camera, fiddled with the buttons for a little bit ("I think this is the record button… no, that makes a bar pop out…") and pointed it at the Luna Diviner. Xion opened another box and pulled out a random bar. She took it over to Saix and held it out to him like one would give a treat to a vicious dog—she still wasn't too trusting of him yet.

Saix took the bar without too much hesitation. He slowly peeled the wrapper off, and, in a truly momentous event, he raised the ice cream bar to his mouth and bit off a chunk.

Axel leaned in. "Hey? It tastes pretty awesome, right?"  
Saix paused for a long moment. "…It's salty… but sweet, too."  
"Those are the exact words of Roxas and Xion. I didn't think you had it in you, Sai."  
"Hmph."

For the record, Saix did finish the whole ice cream bar.

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**THE END**

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**Saix eating ice cream. How's that for an ending? :)**

**Right now, canon is screaming, "WHY?! You'll derail the plot! Why are you doing this?!" Because Xion was about as interesting as a rock in the game, and her manga version doesn't get nearly enough respect from Saix, that's why. Plus, the ending of Days is like, **_**Oh, you care about this person? Screw you, she goes in the shedder. Boo-hoo. By the way, no one else has read the manga, and everyone hates her. HAVE FUN! DISNEY! **_**:( I felt the need to give her a break for once.**

**So, now that this can no longer be defined as a 'minor' AU, what's next? Well, those three-hundred-thirty-six days until Kingdom Hearts completion will be counted in real time, starting yesterday, so you might want to get out a countdown timer of some sort. Besides that, well, a fiery assassin and two clueless kids with giant keys can get into a lot of trouble in three hundred days, and I have enough ideas to keep them going for the whole year, from epic, canon-destroying arcs like this to holiday specials. And if I start running out, I can always turn to you, the readers, and your brilliant prompts. Thanks for everything, guys and gals, you're the best. :)**

**I hope you enjoyed this story. Remember, reviews are always appreciated. I'm practically an assembly line of fics here, so if you're not Dragon Silhouette or DementoFantasy, here's a new question: If you could meet this version of Xion, what would you tell her? Giftfic for the best answer.**

**Thanks for reading, and—*Roxas grabs my shirt and gets uncomfortably close to my face* …Yes, Roxas. Xion is done. It's your turn now. *Roxas fistpumps in the air and runs off to tell Xion something like "In your face, spotlight hog!"* I'll go deal with him… :)**


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